I loved you best — we tried & failed — what if
today you would take my call, once more say yes
walk away from your wife & well-earned rest
to take up again with me — I yearn in this quiet
nest without you, I pretend we could live it over
a parallel life, not be pulled apart by location
by ambition, our callow youth not ready to know
why & what we had & never would have again
in middle years sometimes we met, traitors
to our mates, rabid with desire, no regrets
afterward we would try to smile — the look
in your eyes when I left — once in another year
you died, to say I was bereft would scarcely
exaggerate, such loss has no measure
I pretend how we might have been today
old & grizzled until the end & still together
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